It happened

I work in a couple of large offices. I don’t know about other places to work but I think our office is quite different. There is always a board meeting, staff meeting, someone retiring, and someone moving on to other work. Also on some Fridays or near holiday time there is the office get togethers. This all equates to free food. The buffet includes but is not limited to donuts, subs, pizza, soda, Italian and even Chinese food. There is also staff areas where people feel the need to have small bowls of those little candy bars and other home baked treats. “Try my keesh?" What is Keesh anyway? Is that some exotic recipe that has dog or monkey brains in it? I just know there are chunks of something in that I can’t identify.

Then there are the “reps”. The reps want to push some product sooooo bad they are willing to give us tons of goodies. Pens, clipboards, just about any office “swag” you can think of with their logo on it and of course samples. They also sort of bribe their way in by always getting front end staff a little something… enter more donuts, brownies, cookies, coffee, and rolls. They need boarder guards to stop the illegal immigration of undocumented guest calories into the office.

It’s kind of frightening actually. Somehow word gets out there is food in the break room and workers swarm in like locusts in devouring anything and everything in their path. I don’t know if they are like bloodhounds that are picking up on the scent or if it’s all a big conspiracy with the tech department and secret cameras to always monitor the “hot” areas. It happens even when the snack guy comes to refill the vending machine… I see the staff just on the edge of my vision circling like vultures, just waiting and watching for the right time to strike.

I actually saw someone walk into the break room today and say, ”No food? Hmm.” shrug their shoulders and leave. When they do hit the vending machine it’s like watching NASCAR… they move quickly in change in hand and draw like a wild west gunslinger pushing B7 before the change fully settles all the way down the shoot. In.. out… 15 seconds. Pray chips don’t get stuck hanging on the wire. They will stand there perplexed unable to accept the reality looking at the machine with their heads twisted like that RCA dog listening to that old record player. Then, most knowing I used to lift weights ask me to shake the machine. Of course the noise brings in more people asking, “is there food?”

So “what *it* happened” Today we had a “good-by” party for a staff member. I did take some food, but only a small little version Chinese food container, not a huge plate… or nor did I go up for seconds. Guess what, THERE IS NO FREE FOOD, sure someone else may go to the store and get it… But that food costs me, in calories, in weight, in junk… nothing is free, everything has consequences (be them good and/or bad)

I went to the store tonight with that in mind. My cart filled with granola bars instead of candy bars, V8 instead of soda, and lean meat. It happened. (YES!! *Happy dance* Giggle/snort) Now I need to make a menu happen that doesn’t involve consuming it all at once.

Oh yes, and remember “it happened” at foolsfitness!- Alan